Songtext I don't know how to pray X Ambassadors

I don't know how to pray

[?]
Because life, health, and the endless pursuit [?]

I don't know how to pray
But here I am in this bathroom, hopin' you'll come back soon
Knees on the floor, prayin' to a Lord I don't know
I don't know how to pray
'Cause if I did, I'd be worthless, all I know is curses
You let me down, still I'm feelin' guilty somehow
So here I go: "Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God, what do I do?
Oh, God, oh, God, I ask a favor from you
And I know, I know we've never spoken before
But I hope you hear me, oh, Lord:
Please let my brother live
And let me learn to forgive
And why do bad things happen to good people
That's all, I guess, amen"
And God said

You are definitely not the same person you were when you were a kid, but then you come back full circle when you sort of started become comfortable with who you are and less trying to be something or someone
Right. Yeah, do you guess that was kinda your— at the basis of like a part of your struggle as a kid, like trying—feeling—like you don't know yourself
I feel like I was [?] for everything. I feel like that in my twenties, one of the biggest struggles for me was, you know, finding love