When I think about the truth sometimes
While sitting up alone late
Listening for my heart at night, just to hear it beat
And it's got a hole
There's something wrong, there's something more
'Cause I gave up on believing it
I was just a little, lone bottle babe
Howling in an empty room, just sitting inside for days
We got to perform it, we got to put our best faces on
So people come and go and then disappear for days
So you spend your whole life watching love like staring through a haze
For glory is not my friend
I never win when I try to win
I just lose it all again
And the story I tell myself: it's not your fault, it's not yourself
You were just never born not to win
But I'm sick of lonely mornings, I'm sick of thinking about it
I keep thinking it might change someday
But goddamn I truly doubt it
But it hurts too much to think, and it hurts too much to know it
And it hurts too much to hold too tight, then it hurts when you let go of it
It just fucking hurts all the time, that's why we never notice it
So forget about this paper, forget about the baby
Forget about the times I said if I lost you I'd go crazy
Forget these gilded ceilings, forget my wedding vows
Forget you were the one thing I could never live without
'Cause glory is not my friend
I never win when I try to win
I just lose it all again
And the story that I tell myself, you're better off by all alone
Then I hate being alone
But you cried when I walked away and you said I looked sedated
And just because I hold it in so much doesn't mean I don't fucking hate it
And I just want you to come home
Oh babe, please come home
You say you never left me, but those words you say about me
You never had to hide from all those endless ghouls around me
Because I love you more than that
I love you more than that
I've never loved anything so much
Can't you feel it when we touch?
But I never dared to lose someone and I can't be cool about it
I lay awake and think of you and it hurts so much to doubt it
'Cause glory is not my friend
I always lose when I try to win
Now I've lost it all again
And our story, does it really have to end?
Maybe we could start again
I truly hope we do, my friend
I truly hope we do, my friend
I just can't lose you again
The Airborne Toxic Event is an American rock band from Los Feliz, Los Angeles, California comprising Mikel Jollett (vocals, guitar, keyboards) Steven Chen (guitar, keyboards) Noah Harmon (bass, backing vocals) Daren Taylor (drums) and Anna Bulbrook (viola, keyboards, tambourine, backing vocals). Named after a section of the book White Noise, by Don DeLillo, the group incorporates string instruments and keyboards, along with a standard rock lineup of guitar, drums, and bass guitar.
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