Songtext Everybody's favorite uncle The Alchemist

Everybody's favorite uncle

I said, "Do we have a 10-second delay?”
I said, "Do you know that the show is live?”
“Can you muzzle him and have a talk with him?"
They said no to all three
So?whatever?go?down, it's just?gon' go down?just like that

Uh, I perform like the planets watchin’
Dump another scoop of grease until the pan is poppin' (Sizzlin')
Always a present in the pocket, I'm a Santa stockin'
Snappin’ a flick, I had to pick the panoramic option
I like my images to wrap around (You know)
At the commencement ceremony throwin' camp and gown (Congrats)
Benz with the trimmin’s, the exterior is black and brown
Attach the boogie board to the wagon roof and strap 'em down
I'm lookin’ at the wave report (Yep)
Held up the roof, I had to raise the fort (I did that)
The nights are long and the days are short
So many surfaces, the razor scored
The target I point the laser toward
It's really nothin’ special
The game is dirty, it's a mud wrestle
Every record I bleed and spill a blood vessel (Blood)
Playin’ with the cheat codes, I hit a plus-level
The only one who stood in the wreckage when the dust settled (I was right there)
You lay a hand on me and get infected from the rust metal
Dinner plates jumbo with the bags mixed, I'm makin’ gumbo
I'm everybody's favorite uncle

It's your favorite uncle
Favorite uncle, huh?
And I think your uncle know
Yeah, you old now
Yeah
Yeah, you need to, you need to come on over here to uncle