Songtext This year Hilltop Hoods

This year

Just give me one more minute
Nearly finished

I do not feel nada
Gucci, Louis, Prada
Nothing I could buy to find the feeling that I'm after
Back when I was younger, happiness came easy
Now that I am older, I'm a different species

And I'm so embarrassed that I feel so rotten
Some people have real problems, and I feel I'm not them
If I can't be happy when everything is perfect
I think I must be damaged or do not deserve it
Underneath the surface, feel my blood is rushing
And I'm feeling nervous that I'm feeling nothing
But I'm kind of bluffing about me feeling nothing
I am feeling worry that I am not feeling something
Everything is stressful but nothing is important
Find I can't successfully hold on to a thought but
If that thought's a worry, I hold it like it love me
A bear-hug to crush me, and then it corrupts me, but you know

This here is my year
This here is my year
This, this, this here is my year
This here is my year
This here's my year, this year, yeah
This here's my year, this year, go
This here's my year, this year, yeah
Aye, yo

Listen, it's not like I'm in Mexico sitting in a cabana
But the Lexapro's kicking in, ta-dah
Got my i
Phone acting like a night light
Feelings are killer, wishing I was Mr Brightside
But I'm Mr Why Try, sitting on the sideline
I go missing, bye, bye, like some shitty Wi-Fi
Opening wounds have me looking for a quiet high
Take nine shots, get some dopamine or die trying
When I try some quiet time, ends in an outburst
Live in your head, can't forget to do the housework
It's all about the upkeep, but I cannot keep up
Seems the voices in my head need to speak up
Maybe I need church, or maybe mosque or temple?
Somewhere I can learn to treat myself more gentle
Wake up in the morning, got some hurt that I'm working on through
God, I got me journaling to do and it sound like

This here is my year
This here is my year
This, this, this here is my year
This here is my year
This here's my year, this year, yeah
This here's my year, this year, go
This here's my year, this year, yeah
Aye, yo

Look man, look man
They don't call me Suffa for nothing, don't push man
I'm close to the edge like I'm Bono
In slo-mo, or feeling stuck in time like a photo
The days are long but years are short
But I'm staying strong to clear my thoughts
'Cause I don't want to hurt myself no more
Or pick at the skin until it's thin and so raw
The medication put the weight on
But it's nothing I can't take on to take off
Had a revelation, something I can pray on
I'm late on the self-love, and due for a day off
And what they say of me's that I'm hard work
But I'm working hard on my hurt and my heart now
And the hard work is something I can't shirk
'Cause I know that pain is a burden you pass down