Johnny bought a ticket for a four oclock train
Spilled wine on his shirt and knew thered be a red stain
cause in third world countries there were only two lanes
Left his lover waiting in the pouring rain
There wasnt any law and there wasnt any order
Couldnt find a pay phone that didnt take quarters
Couldnt find a way to cross the goddamn border
He could slip under the fence if he was just a little shorter
And if youre gonna leave then you better move quickly
If youre gonna stay wont you whisper in my ear
My heart is beating fast and Im feeling kinda sickly
Gotta find a way to get the hell outa here
He tried to find the embassy to plead his cause
He was lost like dorothy in the wizard of oz
He was a dictator target getting lots of applause
Had a big white beard like santa claus
Put some drugs in his pocket it was all blackmail
They took away his passport and threw him in jail
Tried to call his parents but to no avail
Couldnt find anybody to pay his bail
And if youre gonna leave then you better move quickly
If youre gonna stay wont you whisper in my ear
My heart is beating fast and Im feeling kinda sickly
Gotta find a way to get the hell outa here
There was a warden in the jail that was so sadistic
Ruled the prison with force, he was militaristic
Made soup out of the prisoners he was canabalistic
Johnny knew that if he stayed it would be fatalistic
The warden summoned johnny to his quarters that night
They took him to the kitchen and they bound him real tight
Johnny knew where he was heading and he knew his plight
They thumped him in the head and then they said, goodnight
And if youre gonna leave then you better move quickly
If youre gonna stay wont you whisper in my ear
My heart is beating fast and Im feeling kinda sickly
Gotta find a way to get the hell outa here
Well they took off all his clothes and they shaved his stubble
They threw him in the pot and then he started to bubble
Johnnys girl got word that he was in some trouble
She headed cross the border right on the double
She got word from the police he was in the hen coup
She did the bureaucrat and shuffled with the hoola hoop
The warden told her, johnny got shot by the steam troops
He said, Im sorry, honey, have another bowl of soup
And if youre gonna leave then you better move quickly
If youre gonna stay wont you whisper in my ear
My heart is beating fast and Im feeling kinda sickly
Gotta find a way to get the hell outa here
Gotta find a way to get the hell outa here
Never find a way to get the hell outa here
Steve Poltz is a performer. His discography includes One Left Shoe, Traveling, Chinese Vacation, Answering Machine and Live At Largo. He is a member of The Rugburns.
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